Brrring!

Brrring!

She sat hugging her knees, looking over at the payphone.  It had been ringing off and on for what must be hours now.  It was very tempting to answer it, but she couldn’t bring herself to.  She would have to uncurl herself from the corner she sat in and that would release all the heat she has been herding.  Heat and her torn, oversized shirt were her only other commodities in the cell; she was not afforded a bed and could not keep her dinner tray.

Brrring!

She did not know whether they, whoever ‘they’ were, had installed this phone for her or whether it had already been here.  It definitely seemed old, but it was difficult to determine much about it in the darkness.  After weeks of imprisonment, her eyes had adjusted to shadow as much as they could.  When she had first arrived here, she didn’t even notice the faint red glow from under the door.

Brrring!

But now she has to cover the crack under the door to sleep; a nightlight wouldn’t deter the nightmares anyway.  Her nightmares wouldn’t let her forget, no matter how much she begged them.  She was already sorry, and if she could go back and do it differently, she would.

Brrring!

She could hear footsteps coming.  It must be dinner time.  A tray slid from under the door.  As much as she loved the comfort of the heat she had trapped, it was worth it to her to let it go for more food.  Perhaps after she satisfied her hunger she would try to create her ball of warmth yet again.

Brrring!

Dinner was the same thing as it had always been: eggs and water.  She grabbed one of the eggs and cracked it on the edge of her tray.  She thought they were supposed to be hardboiled, and she always asked for them to be scrambled, but there had been many times when yolk spilled onto the floor.  There had even been a few times when some kind of bird embryo fell onto her tray.  The thought if it still made her shudder, even after all of this.

Brrring!

She was just happy that it was too dark for her to fully see it.  There were no embryos this time, and only one egg was a little runny.  Even if there had been one, it wouldn’t have stopped her from eating.  She could block out the thought of it when she was hungry; it was when her hunger settled that the thought if it bothered her.

Brrring!

After all her eggs were cracked, she took a drink of water to prepare her stomach.  She had to stick out her tongue after tasting it; the saltiness of it still surprised her.  They always gave her a utensil for her eggs, but she didn’t want it.  It was impractical to eat eggs with forceps.  Instead, she brought the tray closer to her face and vacuumed them up into her selfish mouth.

Brrring!

She wished the phone would stop.  Didn’t it know she was busy?  Was it going to bother her forever?  She just couldn’t bring herself to answer it.  She didn’t trust the phone.  Maybe it was because she already knew who it was: she couldn’t bring herself to listen to the baby’s cries anymore.  Or maybe she didn’t trust it because the phone line was cut.

Brrring!

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