I’ll tell you an inconvenient truth- the sun has always been expanding. It’s a star; it grows until it explodes. It was just sitting up there the whole time, like a big stupid time bomb. Tick tock! Tick tock!
No one knew what it meant at first, but they quickly found out with the rising water and scorching heat. Some herded to the mountaintops to avoid drowning, but they’ll melt sooner. Others went ahead and took the dive. But most people herded like sheep to the middle ground, quickly running out of food and fresh water.
Go ahead and start eating each other, stupid idiots! Ya’ll will be soup soon anyway!